Friday, October 31, 2008

Job Hunt

Ugh. I'm really hating looking for a job... its not just the rejection letters, but the whole process. I can imagine it is a lot easier when you have a specific profession in mind with a solid resume full of experience. But when you only have a vague notion of the profession, and have a woefully lacking resume, it can be downright depressing to even get started.

But this isn't just a blog to whine about the hunt.... but to reflect on the importance of work and being productive.

The last 2 months have been some of the least productive in my adult life, and I can honestly say I don't know how people endure it. I remember growing up around people who were on welfare, or people who had been retired for a number of years, and I don't know how people can get by with that. There is such a lack of purpose, such an emptiness, and such a sense of failure as a human being. Its not just the male role of being the bread winner, but some sense of purpose as a part of the human race. This is a very biblical principle after all.

I remember thinking fondly of this type of time off, and I know for sure that most would look on my last 2 months with envy. But the reality is that in a nation that is suffering financially, jobs being cut, and being a young married couple with lots of bills and loans, it is overwhelming and difficult not to panic.

But I don't want this blog to be all dark and whiny...
Having such a sense of emptiness and useless has caused me to notice all the more those things that I should value the most. Not only small things like ministry and friends, but most importantly my beautiful and loving wife. She has been so patient with me, has yet to nag me about the job thing, has yet to complain when she goes to work each morning and I'm sitting at the computer, and has yet to show any jealousy over my responsibility-free life.

But even more important than her is the fact that I know God will provide. He has already provided, and I know he will continue. More than that I know I need to keep relying on his strength and guidance. That can sound cliche, but it is certainly times like this when faith is challenged, and what we /really/ believe shines through, not just the propositions we half heartedly affirm. So I hope that I can look back on this time in my life and praise the Lord that I held firm to the faith, and continued to follow him and trust him.

1 comment:

Marcy said...

Awww. Thank you (belatedly).